Shit Someone Should Have Told Me! Guest Blogger Liz!

I always kinda feel like Kermit the Frog when I introduce Guest Blogger Liz. I get excited and flail around wildly.

What’s up with chin hairs? I guess I first noticed them about age 45 or so. I used to see little old ladies with them sticking way out like a nanny goat and wonder..why doesn’t anyone tell them? Are they really that clueless? Then it happened to me. No one told me about it either. You better believe I tell every young woman I know. And I scare the heck out of them too! Nah, not really. But seriously, I can pull those little suckers out only to have the next one grow in right behind the one I just yanked! And, when they come back, they are like little wires. When it’s time for you to pluck yours, make sure you are careful to only get the one or two you are after. Because you can miss and get the little hair next to it, then it becomes the little wire. Soon it seems like you’re growing a full beard!

I find myself diligently checking every couple days with my 10x magnifying mirror and my good tweezers nearby. My teenaged son knows these are like gold and not to touch or move them, hence they get lost. And, inevitably, no matter how strong the mirror, or how good the light, you always miss one. And, inevitably, you always find that one you missed at the most inopportune time…usually when you don’t have your golden tweezers.

So, in the past several years of dealing with this, I find I have a slight obsession with the process of removal of the nasty little buggers. It’s gotten to the point where I sit and wait for them. I have my mirror in hand and my tweezers on deck. Sometimes if I’m lucky, I can see the little spot before it comes through the skin and squeeze it out. When this happens I am triumphant! Beat the little sucker to the punch! Drawback: After doing this successfully a few times, I have what appears to be a little road map of the Aleutian Islands on my chin in the form of red spots. So, if you choose this option..make sure you don’t have to go anywhere for a while.

So, unti I win the lottery or find a sugar daddy, I will use my proven method..the Poor Woman’s Electrolysis! Until next time…..~liz

GUEST BLOGGER: Liz

WOOT! first post from awesome author Liz! Liz will be contributing to what I like to call “Shit Someone Should Have Told Me”. Liz recent had her first children’s book published, Pete-O Burrito and the Lucky Stripes.

Very recently I was approached by a friend and asked if I would be interested in writing something for her Blog. “Frog?” I asked. “No, Blog” she said. “Smog?” I asked. “The Troggs? Dog?” “No” she said again calmly. “Blog. B*L*O*G.” “What the heck is a blog? ” I asked. Well, it wasn’t quite like that, but I still had no clue. So she told me that I get to write stuff. I stopped her right there and said to count me in.

So, here I sit, pen in hand-and blank of mind. No, not writer’s block: Senioritis! This is my 50th birthday. I guess I enjoyed my first 49 so much I thought I’d go for it again. Kinda like when Mother Nature gives you a good first kid to trick you into having another one. Ha!

In trying to figure out what to write about, I decided to start with this: My Bucket List. That’s right, ladies, I have one and I encourage you to start one also. Add cool things, things you may think of as unattainable and some fun stuff too. For instance, one of things on my list is to have a case of toilet paper shipped to my house. Why not? I may even expedite the shipping if it’s a dire emergency!

I started creating my own bucket list about a year ago. Since then, I have added to it and subtracted from it.

  • New Orleans for Mardi Gras: Check
  • Become a Published Author: Check (more about this in a later frog..er blog)
  • Dye my hair Veronica Lodge Blue: Check

Get the picture?

I realized well into my 40s that there are not too many people knocking my door down to accompany me, placate me or entertain me. Believe me..I checked. So, I decided I’d better do it myself. And you know what? It’s not so bad after all.

As women in our “sophisticated” years, we have been stuck between chivalry and women’s lib without the foggiest idea of which way to go. So, instead of leaning one way or the other, I’m going straight ahead-full steam- three sheets to the wind (oops..that’s something else)- balls to the wall (that’s another story too) Shotgun seat is open..would love to have you along for the ride!

See you next time!
~liz